Archive | October, 2012

Fearful, I am!

15 Oct

Its 15th October 2012, 11:05 pm. I am lying down on the couch with laptop in my hand while fingers tapping the keyboard, striving at it’s peak to synchronize the nerve message with the words spilling online. I am fearful, yes I am…. my heart has grown lethal, weak and is sinking, still does not wish for an assisting hand. I don’t want anybody to sympathize with my condition, which is not worst… yet gloomy and just unusual!

Its my medical school aptitude test result night. I can sneak into the possibilities, swinging more towards the negative side. yet HOPE is the word. Amid this nervousness (since by the grace of God, I haven’t faced much of challenges), a news just broke…. a traditional rival friend of mine just got engaged! I am glad for her.. a dilute one. See? the fear of failure, even good news is just not good enough.. nothing is working! no spell, no magic, no prayer, no nothing! I am terrified… my future is questionable! What should I do??

Convocation Speech

8 Oct

I begin in the name of Allah, the most beneficent, the most merciful.

So, here we are to celebrate the beginning of an end… with a dense heart and a big smile.

Memory is a way of holding on to things you love, things you are, things you never want to lose. The identity of being a Habibian is something we never want to let go of, retaining the pride, the skill and the honor this very institution has created. Our beloved School and college life is over now, and it’s up to the next class to step into our shoes. These years…. they just flew in the blink of an eye. Standing here today, in front of you all, triggers a gloomy feeling within me that it’s about time…. about time we wave our last good bye’s. We shall now detach from those corridors which once use to relish our pranks and carefree discussions, those classrooms which whisper tales of our lectures and punishments, those labs where we broke plenty of test tubes and burrettes while performing experiments and even got punished for not having ironed lab coats, those assemblies where we learned to honor our national anthem. And most importantly, we shall now take a leave from our uniform, our logo, our teachers… our campus!

Some of us have been here for around 12 or 14 years, others just 2…. but I assure you, the stories are not different. We have memories we would rejoice in forever. May it be Hadia’s illogical questions and theories or Mariam Asghar’s costly chocolate fountain suggestions, we always ended up laughing together. What we are going to miss the most is the stress of biology and accounts, the rush at the last hour of events, rehearsals of our plays, our matches, our campus… nothing, and I mean it, nothing would ever be able to replace all of that.

To our teachers – we owe you gratitude. It’s your magnanimity that you keot on explaining things again and again just because we weren’t paying attention. Thank you for bearing our excuses, for encouraging and supporting us – without you all, our stories wouldn’t have proud endings.

I am standing here today with a heart full of happiness and fear. Today is the day our lives take off. We walk out those doors and it’s never going to be the same again! we have choices to make and paths to choose. Some of us are confused, some of us are anxious, and then there are many of us who just love it here! who can’t imagine making a life some place else. This is my advice to you all. This chapter of your life might be over but never forget the lessons you’ve learned. You are completely changed by the choices you have made in these many years. You’re all important in my eyes, all of you are going to be somebody someday, because we are the class of 2012 and we don’t back down to nothing.

After today, whether it is the pursuit of a good college or a good university, things would be different….. but we can always come back, feel the same warmth and love as we use to before. Habib will welcome us with open arms!

Today, I just don’t want to know what good bye’s mean. I wish it never existed…. but no matter how hard we try, how badly we want to stick together…. but we have to admit… that even the best movies come to an end, and our movies… They have ended here today. So, in the end, I would like to share a verse from Thomas Moore’s poem.

Long, Long be my heart with such memories filled

Like a vase in which, the roses have been distilled

You may break! you may shatter the vase if you will

But the scent of the roses will hang around it still – Good Bye and Stay Blessed

Convocation 2012

8 Oct

A few days back, I had my Higher secondary convocation. Full of pride and honor, the day flew with blissful gestures, prayers, tears and lucks. I was blessed with special respect and affection due to the ending speech I delivered, owing to my position as Head Girl of Habib Girls Higher Secondary School aided by the special bond I luckily share with my teachers and fellows. The convocation ceremony made the entire class feel special, loved and honored.

A glimpse of the event. It all started off when the Gymnasium of HPS was dense with tapping footsteps and melodious tunes. Organizing committee was at the edge, howling like unstable wind striving to ensure that arrangements were up to the mark and every one was at their right place, doing the right job. On the contrary, the conditions outside the venue was presenting more of a bee hive situation. Students roaming around like confused travelers, trying out gowns, fixing hats, predicting tassel positions, taking snapshots, hydrating themselves, posing and what not. It was funny how the teachers were trying to control the slot, dragging them to their positions and yet not being able to make them stick to it. But it was all justified, after all, it was our last chance to be the REAL STUDENTS.

The official event begun with our decent,disciplined, gracefully crafted walk in. We were royal, tall and smart.  It was followed by the national anthem, and speeches from Mrs. Amir Ali and Mrs. Alavi. They covered our entire achievement cloud, mentioned our names and gifted us eternal fame, which all of us cave for 🙂 Admit it!

An introduction was given to Ms. Anita Ghulam Ali, the chief guest of the event. She was majestic, and a stunning old lady – with ideals worth admiration, with achievements worth eternal applause, with words worth wisdom. She delivered a piece of thought, and rendered all of us speechless. I can still hear her voice, as it echos within me all the time. What I didn’t learned in these many years of schooling, she taught me in an instant. Severely arthritic, yet courageous. It was our honor to have her on our big day.

It was followed by the procession. Proud students coming in and receiving their award certificates. The sad part was that the level of enthusiasm and joy which was expected to be reflected in the form of applause was not observed. Only the famous one’s were upheld, and high achievers were acknowledged. That came as an immense displeasure, at least to me. It was a grand end for each one of us.

The distinguishing Higher Secondary section part was the locket which was given to the pioneer batch, as a token of appreciation from the entire staff – just another way of conveying the heart felt words that we were going to be missed. 🙂 (I am sure!)

I feel the necessity of writing about the moment when I went down the stairs to collect my certificate. It was expected, yet came as a surprise. I was the first one from the college who came, shook hands with the honorable Ms Ghulam Ali and recieved the award, she told me that she loved my speech, and also praised me for the results produced. It was a concise encounter, but the decent compliments she gave out made me feel out of the world. I really don’t know about others, But I do have a feeling that she must have regarded all the graduates  Seemed like she loved students!

Now the scene which gifted me lots of hugs and praises, the speech. I prepared for it for about a week or so, and really don’t know how I delivered it. It was indeed the fear of the end and stirred emotions and expressions. Special kudos to Ms. Jamal for aiding me through out the way, and standing beside me in the end to say that you were good! Aarti – the school head girl was commendable in taking the oath. She took all of us to a journey, which exemplified our life at Habib. She was an amazing head girl, indeed.

With a note of Thanks given out by Mrs. Saleem, the event came to an end. The proud parents, the honored graduates, and the teachers begun to murmur good bye’s and it all ended up with pictures, cards and of course – FOOD. 🙂

Thank you HGHSS! – you are going to be missed. But we will hang around as Alumni’s. INSHALLAH.

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